This week was a good first week. Although it was supposed to be "time off" we weren't really up to much of anything else. Stephen is back to work tomorrow after a weeks vacation, so I figured it would be a great opportunity to ease Riley into the homeschooling routine while everyone was around and it was fairly relaxed. We had what I would consider 3 full days where he did a good amount of work. We had a few total knock down drag out meltdowns. He really has no interest most of the time and it really gets to me. He fidgets, he squirms, he says he's bored and he flat out messes around with me. (how to you spell where? Riley: POTATO POTATO POTATO POTATO") I know he's bored with worksheets but I'm in the middle of figuring this all out, I'm learning just as much as he is right now. I want him to pass state standards but then again I also don't really give a crap. Who are they to say where he should or shouldn't be? With Pennsylvania being a state that regulates homeschooling I'm concerned that they'll cause trouble for us in the long run. You rarely hear of cases where the state steps in but I'm not sure if its because it doesn't happen or it just doesn't get talked about.
Among the chaos this week was Riley's age 7 physical. For the third year in a row the physicians basically tried throwing ritalin at us. Every single time Riley goes to the doctor it happens. I'd be lying if I said I don't actually consider it sometimes but ultimately I know it doesn't feel right. The little questionnaire just blows my mind. Some of the questions just sound so absurd! "Does your child lose interest and not finish things he starts?" Um yeah, and so does my husband there 's a garage full of coulda, shoulda, woulda's. You want to drug him too? For that matter I do it too, are there people who don't? It always makes me feel terrible and it really makes me feel like a total failure. I know he's about the most wilful and energetic kid I've ever met, and I know better than anyone else that he's difficult but who's to say he won't naturally grow out of it? Drugging him up doesn't give him the opportunity to solve his own problems himself it teaches him to take a pill to fix it.
I'm taking this into my own hands by schooling him at home and making his behavior my issue, no one elses. Although I may be sacrificing my sanity in the process I don't feel that my child deserves to be drugged to make my life easier. Now I know that's a controversial statement but that's how I feel. We also denied the flu shot, in general we avoid most medications and that's that. If its not necessary we really do try to avoid it. Why is it that ritalin flows like candy anyway? Our doctors are always nice enough but it just saddens me. This medical revolution is just genuinely baffling. Instead of focusing on better health we're creating pills for pills. You take a pill to cure something then take another pill to get rid of the side affects pill #1 gave you ,and so on and so forth . Now I'm not a wing nut (not entirely at least). I'm not anti-medicine at all I just think its over utilized. What did people do with difficult kids before they started drugging them? I'm constantly second guessing myself and over analyzing what I did wrong, but I know ultimately I love my family, Eff the doctors. I truly want nothing but the best for both my kids, why is it so weird that I'm not doping them up and shipping them off to be dealt with by someone else? Its just so discouraging that society in general seems to outcast anything that's not perfect , cookie cutter, or just the same as everything else.
Aside from breaking in the routine today was my appointment at the superintendents office. It turns out that the woman I made my appointment with was not even in the office today. I got the paperwork filled out though, that is what really matters. Riley's guidance counselor from school called in response to my phone call about borrowing books for the rest of the year. She said that the principal basically referred me to the superintendent's office. (Its actually the same woman I talked to already) I was told specifically that I'm to deal with the school directly, and that's why I called them in the first place. It almost sounds as if the principal is being douchey for the sake of her own ego. I've read a lot of people have issue's with their schools trying to be forceful just for the fun of it but eventually they acknowledge the actual law and cave in. I was really hoping that it wouldn't be difficult but I'm not exactly surprised seeing how the administration behaved when my child was actually enrolled there. Seeing as we pay taxes for the public school books and live in a state that's heavily regulated I seem to think that them fighting with me too long would be a really bad idea. Its specified on the Department of Education's website that the school should cooperate but we'll see. All in all, we're coming along. Riley's behavior and reading has already really made improvements, it is what it is. I'm trying and trying to figure this out as I go. I know I shouldn't be so hard on myself but if all the answers were to just magically come to me I'd be thrilled. Yeah that'd be great.
Aside from breaking in the routine today was my appointment at the superintendents office. It turns out that the woman I made my appointment with was not even in the office today. I got the paperwork filled out though, that is what really matters. Riley's guidance counselor from school called in response to my phone call about borrowing books for the rest of the year. She said that the principal basically referred me to the superintendent's office. (Its actually the same woman I talked to already) I was told specifically that I'm to deal with the school directly, and that's why I called them in the first place. It almost sounds as if the principal is being douchey for the sake of her own ego. I've read a lot of people have issue's with their schools trying to be forceful just for the fun of it but eventually they acknowledge the actual law and cave in. I was really hoping that it wouldn't be difficult but I'm not exactly surprised seeing how the administration behaved when my child was actually enrolled there. Seeing as we pay taxes for the public school books and live in a state that's heavily regulated I seem to think that them fighting with me too long would be a really bad idea. Its specified on the Department of Education's website that the school should cooperate but we'll see. All in all, we're coming along. Riley's behavior and reading has already really made improvements, it is what it is. I'm trying and trying to figure this out as I go. I know I shouldn't be so hard on myself but if all the answers were to just magically come to me I'd be thrilled. Yeah that'd be great.
I am fortunate to live in a very homeschooling friendly state. I was able to pull my daughter from school in March and then totally detox her until the following fall. Hang in there! I know it will get better and you'll both get things figured out.
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